He Promised He'd Be There

There are many times in our lives we want to ask God why we were abandoned. He promised He'd be there for us, but do we always notice His grace?

I have had many times in my life where I have questioned God's plan for me. From losing a parent at a young age, surviving abuse, becoming a birth mother, and having my "perfect" marriage shattered by infidelity, I questioned God. Why me? What's His plan for me? I am on my journey to find out. I am trying to find my way from the shadows of despair, to truly feeling His light.

Sweet Girl, Do You Know Who You Are…Pt. 1

So, I want to switch gears a little bit and go with something that has always been close to my heart and something I really wish I could help with more. This might be a multi-part post so stick with me here. A while back my beautiful, sweet seven year old...a girl that doesn't hold back, wears her heart on her sleeve, takes what she wants and believes and runs with it....was talking with me as we prepared lunch. She looked up at me with her big, blue eyes and said, "Mom, does that have carbs in it?" I was taken back. My husband and I made a very strong…
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Lately It’s Been Hard

*Long post ahead* It was a typical Sunday. My family of now seven was going to church for the first time since our baby was born and she was not happy about it. The poor girl had been up all night crying, upset belly and constipated. To top it off, it was Easter Sunday and my four older children were upset because we wouldn't allow them to have their Easter baskets until after church. As we rushed into the chapel, I knew it was obvious how big of a wreck we were. My baby cried the entire time, my two year old battled for the attention of being of the…
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Continue to Stand

So, I can't believe it's been almost a year since I wrote last. I have to say I'm slightly embarrassed about that but there was a reason, even if it wasn't a very good one. Back in March I was a featured writer on The Moments We Stand blog and I talked a little about my history including problems within my marriage and how it had helped my testimony. I don't know what I expected to come of writing that, maybe a few people would see it. I didn't plan on much, however, it had a further reach than I thought it would. As I read through the comments on…
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He Never Leaves Us

This post was published on The Moments We Stand blog. You can find it here. It is often said that we find our greatest strengths in our lowest moments. I would have to agree with that. When I was three years old my father passed away from health complications. Throughout elementary and middle school I was teased for it. I wouldn’t necessarily say I was bullied, I just didn’t click anywhere very well. When I started high school, I was pretty well like any other teenager. I was just trying to find my place. I clicked with a group of kids that were more the “wild” crowd. I went to…
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Today It Hurts Less

*I wrote this on February 6 on my drive home from my birth son's baptism. His birthday was February 1 and the placement anniversary was February 3.* Eight years ago I lost a piece of my heart. Today it hurts less. As I watch him enter the baptismal fount with his dad, I am reminded of the day he was sealed to them. Today it hurts less. As I give him a hug, tell him I love him and walk out the door to drive away leaving behind that piece of my heart knowing, like the first day I placed him in their arms, that goodbye isn't forever. Today it…
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Our Scars are Our Witness

There is a huge misconception within our culture that we need to be joyful in our struggles and our trials. There is even a stronger misconception that we are not trusting God if  we find ourselves in darkness or despair. Further those with mental/emotional illnesses and disorders are often told to "get over it" or trust God more, instead of people reaching out to comfort and support them. There can be great damage that can come from remaining in a state of despair without an attempted hope for the light in our life, however, there can come great strength in the feeling of momentary hopelessness. I have had several experiences…
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